RESUMO
BACKGROUND: Longer lives increase the possibility of caring duties, which means that older adults looking after their ageing parents-as well as their own partners-is becoming an increasingly common scenario in developed countries. OBJECTIVE: To explore the caregiving demands of very old caregiving dyads and the experience of maintaining the identity of a child at such an advanced age. DESIGN: Qualitative study. SUBJECTS: 15 participants (four males), all aged 70 or over and caring for their mothers, aged between 95 and 105 years old. METHODS: Semi-structured interviews analysed thematically. RESULTS: Caregivers are willing to care for their mothers 'until death tears them apart', despite the double strains they face, that is more self-limitations and added care receiver need. On a positive side, they feel 'happy, thankful and proud' for still having their mothers alive. They also describe that maintaining the identity of a child at such an advanced age was somewhat unthought of and unexpected but an important source of pride. CONCLUSIONS: These findings suggest that these oldest-old caregiving dyads are characterised by a relationship shaped by strong feelings of extended filial love, constituting a family feature that needs further understanding. Findings also underscore the challenges these carers face in dealing with several agents (secondary caregivers) and entities in the care provision.